A wave retreats—
Not in surrender, but in preparation to return stronger.
The Moment Everything Changed
There was a day, not long ago, when I stood at the threshold of my own undoing.
Not the quiet kind of change—the slow, gradual shifts that you only notice in hindsight. No, this was the kind that arrives uninvited, upends everything, and leaves you standing there, blinking at the wreckage, wondering how you’re supposed to go on.
The kind that knocks the breath from your lungs, the kind that forces you to say goodbye to something you thought would last forever.
And I thought, this is it.
This is where I unravel.
Because loss, real loss, is not just about absence. It is about watching the future you had planned dissolve in front of you, and realizing that you have no choice but to rewrite it.
I had believed that if I held on tightly enough, if I did everything right, the world would bend to my will. But life does not work like that. Life does not ask for permission before it changes.
The Anatomy of Starting Over
Beginnings are not as beautiful as people pretend they are.
They do not arrive wrapped in clarity, in certainty, in the neatness of fresh starts. They arrive like wreckage—disjointed, messy, painful.
- The last conversation that lingers in your mind.
- The weight of what is no longer yours to hold.
- The ache of standing in the same place, but no longer belonging.
- The quiet moment when you realize the only way forward is through the unknown.
And then—stillness.
No perfect signs, no grand revelations. Just the soft realization that the past has already let go of you.
Now, it is your turn to let go of it.
Wabi-Sabi and the Beauty of Becoming
Wabi-sabi teaches that the most beautiful things are those that have been remade.
A river does not resist its course; it carves new paths.
A forest burned to the ground will bloom again.
A person who has lost everything is not empty—they are open.
We are not meant to stay the same. We are meant to transform.
Beginnings do not mean going back to who you were.
Beginnings mean allowing yourself to become someone new.
Lessons from the Aftermath
- You are not starting over. You are starting from experience.
- The past is not a home. It is a lesson.
- What feels like loss is often a clearing for something greater.
- You are allowed to grieve what was and still move forward.
- You are not defined by what you have lost, but by what you choose to build next.
The Wreckage, the Stillness, the Step Forward
I look back at that moment, at the version of me standing in the ruins, and I no longer see someone who was broken.
I see someone who was being remade.
Because when everything falls apart, you learn something most people never do—endings are just beginnings in disguise.
And the first step forward is always the most powerful one.